What is the reason behind 'coming out'

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Feb 2020
10:51am, 8 Feb 2020
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Joopsy
We all do to some extent Trin, it was a big shock to my daughter to realise it just wasn’t accepted by everyone else and that not everyone was okay with it.
Feb 2020
10:53am, 8 Feb 2020
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JK *chameleon*
I'm no fan generally of PDAs, but holding hands is such an innocuous thing.

I'll give the stink-eye to any couple engaging enthusiastically in tonsil tennis in my presence - however that couple is made up!
Feb 2020
11:02am, 8 Feb 2020
35,753 posts
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Nellers
I'm with you on that, JK! But seeing couples being couples? I just don't see how that bothers anyone whoever the couple is.

It clearly does, though. Daughter has loved being in Manchester and her uni flat mates and course mates are all totally fine with her being her. As far as I'm aware all her close friends up there are straight but in the uni it's just never been an issue. OUtside of that, like last night, though, different rules seem to apply.

And to be fair we live in a small town in Tory Brexity Essex and something similar happened once on our highstreet, but only once. If she'd been gay and out and in my school year I'd have worried for her life every day.
Feb 2020
12:41pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Trin
Just back from a run and did some thinking while I was out (took my mind off the hills a bit 😉).

My opinion is that Schofield did a disservice by coming out in such a public way because it was like saying "look at me, I'm different" or "I'm different to who you thought I was". It gives ammunition to those who look for, or need it, to attack those 'differences'.

There will always be people who don't like something about another group of people, whether it be colour, race, sexuality, or even disability, so what's the point in highlighting those things about us, or making it newsworthy?

Wars don't win battles. Acceptance of who we are and also acceptance of the fact that there will always be someone who doesn't like who we are, for whatever reason, is the only way to win.

Thanks to Philip Schofield the whole media circus is having a field day and making lots of money out of something that at the end of the day is actually normal.
Feb 2020
12:48pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Joopsy
Still disagree Trin, he just got one step ahead of the media’s field day and was able to alert his family. It would just have been the media breaking his big dirty secret otherwise. Sadly, it’s the media Britain wants.
Feb 2020
1:15pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Trin
That is exactly it though, if everyone keeps looking at being gay as a 'big dirty secret' then that's the way it will always be.
Feb 2020
1:16pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Nellers
I’m with Joopsy. Plenty of people already only see the difference rather than the person. Perhaps a few schofe fans with homophobic views are questioning those views today.
Feb 2020
1:41pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Jono.
One of the reasons I love radio is because you can't see whose speaking, it makes you blind to everything but the persons story, the point they're trying to make.

If you call someone out for who they are and for whatever prejudice they harbour or promote, you're now met with ' I'm telling it like it is' attitude.
Feb 2020
1:41pm, 8 Feb 2020
1,738 posts
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Trin
Yes, from reading posts on here clearly plenty of people already only see the difference rather than the person, but whose fault is that? And by making a big issue of those differences are we not perpetuating the 'ists' or 'phobic' attitudes?
Feb 2020
1:50pm, 8 Feb 2020
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Jono.
Trin it's all part of the media circus, I can't remember the last time I purchased a news paper and my only social media connections are with fetch and twitter and if I find anyone on Twitter spouting shite I block or unfollow the person (can't seem to avoid Julia Hartley Brewer though)

I personally don't care if Phil is gay, I do have some sympathy with people who have to live a lie and the devastating effects it can have on their family when they have to confront reality.

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So Schofield came out as gay today, which is great that he doesn't have to pretend to be someon...

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