Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.
135 watchers
Feb 2019
6:33am, 15 Feb 2019
1,161 posts
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Little Miss Happy
That doesn't sound like good practise at all Daisy - and I don't think that moving the phone line should be down to you in the circumstances. Oh dear Dio, I hope it's just a temporary blip. Just keep breathing Linds. Is she with you for long? MDM again yesterday, FiL is showing no sign of decreasing agitation so they have changed his meds again in an attempt to sedate him a bit. They have given up on the Alzheimer's meds and I think the gradual cognitive decline that we have been seeing over the past few weeks is likely to accelerate. On a more positive note MiL seems to be adjusting to the situation albeit it feels like one step forward and two back much of the time. |
Feb 2019
8:00am, 15 Feb 2019
25,687 posts
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LazyDaisy
Linds your mum is not alone - I was annoyed (again) with the BBC yesterday for repeatedly playing a vox pop from the East End of two women quite virulently 'anti'. If that's constantly drip fed into people's ears, it's not a surprise if they start to think that's the proper response.  LMH that's sad about your FiL but does show he couldn't carry on being cared for at home. At least your MiL is getting used to the situation. |
Feb 2019
8:03am, 15 Feb 2019
26,390 posts
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LindsD
That sounds hard, LMH. She's here until tomorrow. I just feel guilty losing my temper but the combination of the constant judgement and the resentment at everyone else with the neediness and the repetition of every story and opinion has me on edge all the time. I can't find anything positive in our relationship at the moment and that makes me sad as she won't be around for ever. |
Feb 2019
8:04am, 15 Feb 2019
16,545 posts
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Carpathius
Totally fair enough Linds. Just because people are elderly doesn't mean they can't be pulled up on saying or doing unreasonable things if they understand what they're saying. Dio, that sounds like she’s so used to looking in her book and working from that that a misread name caused the confusion. Hopefully that's all it is. Daisy, that's awful - they definitely shouldn't be moving someone prone to confusion unless there's no other option. Any work on her room sounds like it isn't immediately necessary. They ought to sort out the 'phone line too (and pay any charges for moving it). Oh dear LMH. I hope your FiL is able to redid to the new meds. Big hugs, that's so hard to watch. |
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Feb 2019
8:05am, 15 Feb 2019
26,391 posts
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LindsD
Cross post. That's it, LD! She was reading the bloody Standard. She watches Breakfast and the bloody One Show. She gets her opinions from there. Her neighbour voted leave. Mind you, her best friend is a card-carrying member of the Labour party. |
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Feb 2019
8:09am, 15 Feb 2019
16,546 posts
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Carpathius
Ooops, pressed wrong button. MiL is sort of settling in. She's still constantly talking about Tony, says one thing to us and another to other people, and Tony has said to people at her old place that he's going to get her by taxi and 'bring her home' which has seriously pissed us off. I didn't visit the last couple of days because I was exasperated by everything she's been saying to others (we've taken all her money, for one thing). I know she can't help it and don't think she's doing it deliberately which makes me feel bad for being annoyed. I also started back at uni this week so I'm tired. |
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Feb 2019
8:10am, 15 Feb 2019
16,547 posts
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Carpathius
Lots of cross-posts. Hugs for Linds (((( ))))
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Feb 2019
8:14am, 15 Feb 2019
25,691 posts
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LazyDaisy
Carp that does sound like normal 'settling in' behaviour if my mum was anything to go by in the early months. I know I posted repeatedly on here about how unpleasant my mum was to me. Thankfully we seem past that stage now. It may be best *not* to visit to too much while she's settling in, perhaps? |
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Feb 2019
8:17am, 15 Feb 2019
16,549 posts
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Carpathius
I wondered that Daisy, but it's more about not letting her think we've dumped her there and forgotten her. Plus her very elastic experience of time means she forgets when we last came. It doesn't help that I can't get her 'phone line installed until the 4th. |
Feb 2019
8:30am, 15 Feb 2019
7,950 posts
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Mandymoo
Sending massive hugs to all on here. Linds I totally get where you are coming from, I keep counting to 10 with my mum and trying not to snap, but then every so often it just comes out. My daughter also snapped at my mum yesterday - Daughter is a hairdresser, Mum cant get out so daughter has been doing her hair. Mum then got a friend of hers to do her hair, then moaned at my daughter that it has not set and stayed like when my daughter does it! It didn't go down well. Things seem to progressing with getting Mum into assisted living here - Dr's and specialist have provided written evidence that mum needs assistance, and she should be assessed by SS next week. My daughter is getting married 2 weeks today, so all of that along with all what is happening with mum is very stressful - thankfully my sister and I are working together and do keep having a good old laugh about it all. We couldn't do it without each other |
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