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Support thread for parents of teenagers

2 lurkers | 124 watchers
20 Jan
10:40pm, 20 Jan 2020
6492 posts
Good to hear she's getting the help she needs, and that there is support for you as well. Wishing you all strength x
21 Jan
12:41pm, 21 Jan 2020
9451 posts
So pleased that you are all getting the help you need xx
6:14pm, 22 Jan 2020
32874 posts
Short version

We were at a family party (elsewhere) on Sat. LittleD refused to come out of her (temporary) room and spent the first hour or so chewing her nails and being nasty to me. Then she lay on the bed face-down. Various people tried to distract her and by the end of the night she was fine, and wishing that she'd gone to the party.

Today she got sent out of class again. I'm away, so have missed most of the proceedings, but have had two conversations with the school, one with a teacher who told me what happened. If his account is to be believed he gave her a lot of chances: "she's bright, if she worked at all she would do really well, etc. etc.". OH is going into school in the morning.

He has got her to agree to see a counsellor that we organise. Whether that will help, I don't know. He has also told her that if things don't change there will be sanctions. I'm wondering more and more about autism but I wonder if I'm focusing on that because it would be an explanation.
6:39pm, 22 Jan 2020
6494 posts
Might be worth trying to find a counsellor who has some experience of autism in girls. They could then advise you on whether or not to pursue a diagnosis. Having just come out of the other end with SweetPea being diagnosed this week, I can confirm it's a huge relief and a lot has slotted into place

But, LittleD needs support now, and anything formal will take time. A counsellor sounds like a good idea. Not sure about sanctions tho- they haven't had the desired effect when meted out by school.

Must be hard being away, but now at least Mr D has to deal with the school for a change
6:43pm, 22 Jan 2020
32876 posts
Yes, all good points. We don't as a rule use sanctions, but nothing else has helped. Hopefully she will find a counsellor she can talk to, try to get to the bottom of what she is feeling that is making her act out like this, and work it out that way. Any sanction is likely to be the removal of her ipod, which might be no bad thing for mental health anyway, but I am uneasy about it.

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Mine are 16 and 18, boy and girl respectively
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