Elderly parents or relatives to care for and/or worry about? This is the place for you.

1 lurker | 115 watchers

Mandymoo 20 May 6:42pm, 20 May 2022 14457 posts	0 Mandymoo How frustrating Frag Polly sounds fun. Visited mum yesterday, she was a bit down, moaning that she hasn't seen Mandy for ages (sigh, here we go again but she meant my sister). Was a bot said when I took her back inside and she said I hate this bit 😔
McGoohan 20 May 8:05pm, 20 May 2022 51394 posts	0 McGoohan I'm sorry people are having it hard (as so many of us are on this thread) but I thought I'd give you a bit of levity. You may recall how my MiL has been demanding Liebling order honeys, jams and marmalade every week in their Sainsbury's shop. There was so much tyhat I was able to take over a dozen to the foodbank. Anyway the preserves obsession seems to have ended. But every week MiL asks Liebling to buy a couple of bars of Lindt chocolate. 'Are you sure?', Liebling always asks. 'Yes, your Dad loves it and he gets through a bar very quickly.' 'Okay then...' Except that Liebling's older sister was there today. She went in the cupboard in the telly room and found this. There are over twenty unopened bars of Lindt in there. Not to count all the Twixes. There are plenty of worse things they could be hoarding.
LindsD 20 May 8:13pm, 20 May 2022 54735 posts	0 LindsD It's a Lindt library!
Bazoaxe 20 May 8:23pm, 20 May 2022 22685 posts	0 Bazoaxe Mrs axe is quite upset at present. Her brother is away for a weeks holiday and MiL is delighted as he needs a break. He is not long back from a week in Majorca and has had a few weekends away as well recently. Meantime we have been getting challenged about our holiday plans and the dreadful risk we are putting our family under with covid out there. then MiL found out Mrs Axe had three days off this week she scolded her for taking time off in case she loses her job.
LindsD 20 May 8:36pm, 20 May 2022 54737 posts	0 LindsD Sounds really upsetting
poppyH 20 May 9:06pm, 20 May 2022 1605 posts	0 poppyH FDNB Santander have been tricky to deal with, my dad and I are appointed jointly as my aunts deputies. The only way we can make transactions from her account is both of us in person (we live 90 mins apart) with photo ID at a branch. No online access/debit card, oh and £10 per cheque issued from the branch... Nationwide were much more accommodating.
poppyH 20 May 9:06pm, 20 May 2022 1606 posts	0 poppyH That's an impressive stash.
Diogenes 20 May 9:14pm, 20 May 2022 69973 posts	0 Diogenes I remember the post office being the most difficult to deal with when I had POA for my mum. I wanted to transfer her money from her PO account and close it. They kept rejecting my application, asking for more documentation and ID which I had to present in person. Eventually I gave up, withdrew the money in cash and left the account empty. Eventually they automatically closed the account after two years of inactivity. I’m glad I didn’t have to deal with them once mum died.
Little Miss Happy 21 May 6:10am, 21 May 2022 5793 posts	0 Little Miss Happy It does annoy me when they are like that Baz but I'm afraid there often seems to be one 'golden child' who can do no wrong whilst the other works themselves into a frazzle. Does she just forget where it is McG or is there something else going on?
Mandymoo 21 May 7:37am, 21 May 2022 14460 posts	0 Mandymoo My brother is the golden one in our house, if anything goes wrong it is always my fault and my sister is just treated horribly by mum McG mum used to be the same with bleach and clingfilm!!!

About This Thread

Maintained by LindsD

I thought I'd start a thread, as lots of us have elderly folks that we worry about/care for.

Useful info for after someone dies here (with thanks to grast_girl)
moneysavingexpert.com

Other useful links

myageingparent.com

moneysavingexpert.com

Who pays for residential care? Information here:

ageuk.org.uk

Also: After someone dies, if their home insurance was only in their name, sadly the cover becomes void. But if the policy was in joint names, it will still cover the surviving policyholder (though the names on the policy will need to be updated).

A useful book of exercises for memory loss and dementia
amazon.co.uk

Pension Credit. The rules are a bit complex but if your elderly relative has some sort of disability (in this case dementia/Alzheimer's) and go into a home, they may be able to claim pension credit. So if carers allowance stops, it seems pension credit can start. It can also be backdated.

Fall alarm company, etc.

careium.co.uk