Bereavement

24 watchers
Aug 2020
6:44pm, 26 Aug 2020
40108 posts
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LindsD
Glad to hear it, jda
Aug 2020
7:20pm, 26 Aug 2020
35125 posts
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Nick Cook
My wife Jan died in February this year. We'd been told in September last year that the cancer had spread to her brain and that we should think about things we wanted to do, and do them. So I retired, but unfortunately she deteriorated quicker than expected. We did manage a Rhine cruise in October, but she couldn't manage the excursions, so we just stayed on the boat.

She wanted to be buried and left plenty of money to pay for it (it was quite expensive)!

I'm getting on OK. I have the occasional wobble, mainly in the evenings, but I'm not too bad. My son and daughter are both quite close and keep in touch, so that's nice.

I've decided to stay retired. I wasn't enjoying the job anyway, so playing lots of golf at the moment.

Going to Devon on Friday with my daughter for a week.
Aug 2020
7:28pm, 26 Aug 2020
43439 posts
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Lip Gloss
Aw Nick that must have been so hard but glad you were in a position to give up working and make the most of the very short time you had left :-(
Aug 2020
11:15pm, 26 Aug 2020
35130 posts
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Nick Cook
In all our married life, I've wanted to listen to music in the evenings, but Jan had wanted the tele on. Now I can listen to music, it just makes me think of Jan, whereas watching the tele takes
Aug 2020
11:16pm, 26 Aug 2020
35131 posts
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Nick Cook
My mind off her.

(sorry, pressed submit too soon).
Aug 2020
11:22pm, 26 Aug 2020
45656 posts
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Derby Tup
Thoughts with you Nick
Aug 2020
7:18am, 27 Aug 2020
160 posts
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Big_G
Does anyone here use running to help with grief? Not as a "cure" as such, but just to help at least a bit? I still do, after the death of my wife (38) in 2014. I went for a run two days after she died, which seems a bit odd I suppose but I didn't know what else to do!
Aug 2020
7:40am, 27 Aug 2020
18449 posts
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EvilPixie
I ran in the morning of the funeral
Aug 2020
7:43am, 27 Aug 2020
45660 posts
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Derby Tup
Running (especially off road, where you need to really focus on what you’re doing) is great for taking your mind off things generally. For regular runners it’s ‘normal’ and bereavement triggers very strong abnormal feelings
jda
Aug 2020
7:45am, 27 Aug 2020
8186 posts
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jda
I find it generally relaxing and destressing. Not specifically for grief but for everything!

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